"I Can't Believe That Happened "and “Because I Could Not Stop” by Helen Myhre

I Can’t Believe That Happened

I can’t believe I did that.
I can’t believe I left.
I can't believe after the years of shrinking my voice, my mind, and my self.
After the years of following the beat of only his drum.
After the years of pretending to be happy.
I can’t believe I left.
It was the start of the unfreeze, the start of feeling, the start of learning to live again.
But I didn’t know how. I didn’t know how to feel or what to feel or how to speak.
I didn't recognize my own voice.
What was this pain I felt? Where was it coming from? What do I do with it?
The emotional pain soon turned into physical pain. I understood this pain.
I saw the pain with my own eyes as it dripped down my arm.
Years of unspoken pain, released at last.

Because I Could Not Stop

Once I started, I could not stop.
The first taste of freedom was so sweet.
The second taste was even better. I was off and running.
Running toward a better story, a better me, a better life.
There was no stopping.
Launching forward, creating my own destiny. Controlling my own journey.
Bursting through the finish line.